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Mom and Dad ask, “Where did we go wrong!?!” by Ken Nair

The purpose of this article is to address a situation that is causing much grief in many families.  It seems to have no solution, leaving many parents to face agonizing grief and guilt.

Let’s take a peak into the lives of some honest, committed-to-their-children, self-sacrificing parents.  These parents, after a life of sincerely caring for their family and purposefully providing a Christian home, can be heard making the following statements.

“I don’t know what’s come over our son.  He’s hanging around with some corrupt kids and he’s staying out late at night getting into all kinds of trouble.”

“The guy our daughter’s dating doesn’t believe in God.  We’ve talked ‘till we’re blue in the face about it and she rejects everything we say.  He treats her like trash, and she keeps going back for more”

“We’ve just found out that our son has been drinking and using drugs for a long time.  He knows we’re against it.  We’ve tried to reason with him but he gets angry at us and doesn’t listen.”

“Our daughter’s getting into this vampire stuff.  She doesn’t talk with us, and when she’s home she goes straight to her room where she listens to loud blaring stuff she calls music.  And we’ve started noticing scratches or cuts on her arms.”

“Our son has quit going to church and has stopped praying or reading his Bible.”

“Our daughter makes spiteful remarks about and is ready to debate our perspectives on Christianity and the Bible, and she is frequently ready to debate them.”

You may have either faced similar situations or you know someone who has.  And if it’s happened to you, you’ve wondered, “Where did we go wrong?” 

Some parents might say, “It’s as if Satan stole our son or daughter and replaced him/her with a demon possessed clone!”  Even though your situation may vary, the same attitudes are apparent.

As a Christian parent, you may be facing or have faced this dilemma.  If so, that’s what I want to address.

Let me use a real case as an example.  This case is meant to be generic so it could easily be about a son or daughter.  If this example seems more radical than your situation, keep in mind, if you can gain understanding about a radical situation, surely the solution can be applied to lesser situations.

Here’s the scenario: This family attended church “religiously.” (Attending church religiously is not a contributing factor.) Their son accepted Christ as his Savior at an early age and regularly attended church with his parents.  They made sure that their son’s Sunday school teachers were teaching the fundamentals of Christianity.  The family practiced traditionally understood Christianity in their home.

In other words they did everything they believed Christian parents should do.  Still, during their son’s high school years or shortly after his graduation, these parents started noticing changes in their son... Continue reading Ken Nair's article.